From a flyer I found at Pittsburgh Action Against Rape

Things You Will Learn in the Healing Process

- Responsibility and blame for the assault/abuse always and forever belongs to only one person: the perpetrator.

- Nothing that you did (or did not do) provides adequate justification for sexual assault/abuse.

- The assault/abuse happened because the perpetrator chose to seek out or create a situation where he/she could attack without being caught. Sometimes he/she will set it up so that the victim feels safe and then takes advantage of the victim lowering his or her guard.


- Whatever you did in response to an assault or abuse, you did it to survive and to get through.

- The fight, flight or freeze response is something that happens automatically. All are instincts that we use to survive.

- Fight is when we get geared up to react; flight is when we try to get away; freeze is when we shut down, become frozen and immobilized.


- You must trust that whatever you did or did not do, served that instinct for survival.


- You are here; whatever you did or did not do helped to make sure of that.