"Don't kill me!"

I personally think that Shwarz is the creepiest fucker in the show. When I read the text for the first time, he stuck out to me as the most scary.

Remember George Sodini? He was from around here, in Pittsburgh, and one summer day about two years ago he went to an LA Fitness with a duffel bag full of guns and shot up a women's aerobics class. His journals were full of racist and deeply misogynistic ramblings. He had rage and entitlement issues. And his whole life, women would say he was a "nice guy" while they rejected him.

And, yes, he was well groomed and polite on the surface, but obviously had some problems. The women he hit universally stayed away for a reason.

Read this article about it by Kate Harding. Here's a taste: 

Telling a guy the real reasons you're not interested -- you don't find him attractive, he's way too old for you, you get a distinctly creepy vibe off him, whatever -- or offering no explanation at all, because you just met this guy and owe him nothing, would be "rude." And thanks to the conditioning Harriet describes, exhibiting the slightest hint of "rudeness" to any stranger who approaches you with sex on his mind makes you feel not like a normal human being with healthy boundaries, but a mean, frigid, stuck-up bitch. Worse yet, sometimes, the same man who called you beautiful and offered to buy you a drink ten seconds ago will turn aggressive when you say you're not interested; he'll tell you flat out you're a bitch, or a whore, or less printable things. He'll reject your rejection by getting in your face and losing his temper. So really, it's a lot safer and simpler to say, "Look, you're a nice guy, but no thanks/I have a boyfriend/I can't." Most guys will walk away calmly after that -- and hey, it's none of your concern what they go home and write in their diaries.

"Who knows, you might even be cured."

In South Africa, lesbians live in fear of "corrective" rape. Groups of men gang-rape and murder lesbians to "cure" them and the government largely ignores the hate crimes.

Video and news article here. And it's from 2009, so this is really recent and relevent.

Everyone's so mean to Geschwitz! And in the real world, lesbians do face quite a lot of harassment.

"a guarantee of survival is de rigueur for a happy affair"

(pronunciation of de rigueur here)

I've been reading about sex work in regards to Lulu, but I think there's a lot there for Rodrigo, too. He sells his sexual services for money after all.

Safety is the #1 consideration for any sex worker. They want to make a buck, sure, but first they want to not die. The more desperate a worker is for money, the more risks they'll take, in the clients they choose to see, the places they'll go, and the kind of work they'll participate in.

I think all the suitors coming in and out and the threats of violence Rodrigo faces in Lulu's "posh place" is way more than he bargained for, and he's telling Lulu that she's pushing his safety boundary with all of the shenanigans.

Though Rodrigo is physically much stronger than Lulu and a man, he's still the only character she really has any power over. I mean, she exerts a kind of "male gaze" on him for a change. She doesn't have the kind of power that comes from being pretty, the superficial "power" she feels on her pedestal, but Rodrigo depends on her for payment and is therefore at her will. Does he even think she's that hot? He has to do what she says regardless of how he thinks she looks.

Interesting power relationships to play with there.

Fuck the Pain Away - Peaches

This song is perfect. There's no music video unfortunately (or maybe fortunately)

"All white. What does it mean, I wonder?"

Everything I'm finding says that white flowers mean purity, humility, innocence, new beginnings. Pretty much the same thing a white wedding dress means.

Hmmm.

From a flyer I found at Pittsburgh Action Against Rape

Things You Will Learn in the Healing Process

- Responsibility and blame for the assault/abuse always and forever belongs to only one person: the perpetrator.

- Nothing that you did (or did not do) provides adequate justification for sexual assault/abuse.

- The assault/abuse happened because the perpetrator chose to seek out or create a situation where he/she could attack without being caught. Sometimes he/she will set it up so that the victim feels safe and then takes advantage of the victim lowering his or her guard.


- Whatever you did in response to an assault or abuse, you did it to survive and to get through.

- The fight, flight or freeze response is something that happens automatically. All are instincts that we use to survive.

- Fight is when we get geared up to react; flight is when we try to get away; freeze is when we shut down, become frozen and immobilized.


- You must trust that whatever you did or did not do, served that instinct for survival.


- You are here; whatever you did or did not do helped to make sure of that.